"We don’t get where we’re driving by staying in the rearview mirror."

Transforming Self-Judgment into Empowered Growth

When you’re facing the edge of growth, how do you speak to yourself? Do you replay past mistakes and criticize your choices? Or do you approach yourself with curiosity and compassion? The way we navigate these pivotal moments matters, and shifting our inner dialogue can be transformative.

Imagine this: your child is about to level up in martial arts. Do you say, “Why did you mess up last time?” Or do you encourage them by saying, “Hey, remember the challenge you faced last time? Let’s think about how to approach it differently now.” Which of these creates an opportunity for growth?

The same principle applies to how you relate to yourself. We’re all reparenting ourselves in some way. While you may have made significant progress in your relationship with yourself, there’s always room to parent yourself with more love, curiosity, and encouragement. Instead of judgment, meet yourself with the kind of support you would offer a child standing at their learning edge.

Recognizing Your Learning Edge

Growth isn’t about staring in the rearview mirror, fixating on past mistakes. It’s about recognizing patterns and preparing to navigate challenges differently. When you notice a familiar obstacle approaching, try saying:

*"Hey, bud, I see we’re approaching the same lesson we encountered last time. How can we approach it differently this time?"

This shift in energy moves you from judgment to curiosity. It opens a space for childlike wonder and presence, allowing you to engage with life’s challenges in a way that fosters growth.

The Power of Creation

The way you relate to yourself doesn’t just impact your inner world—it shapes your external reality. We are creators of our experiences in ways that go far beyond what we understand. Here’s a real-life example:

I was facilitating a powerful breakthrough for siblings who were healing deep generational wounds. At the height of their emotional release, the wind formed a whirlwind around us—only in our immediate space. As the energy in their conversation shifted and calmed, the wind dissipated. It was as if the world around us responded to the energy of their transformation.

On another occasion, I was meditating on the idea that we project our realities onto the world. Later, while walking into a grocery store, I saw a lone cart sitting apart from the rest. As I thought about grabbing it, the cart began to roll toward me on flat ground, meeting me where I stood. The experience was a visceral reminder of how much we shape the world around us with our energy and intentions.

These moments illustrate a larger truth: the way we relate to ourselves impacts not just our personal growth but the reality we create. When you treat yourself with kindness and curiosity rather than judgment, you align with easeful growth and open yourself to greater possibilities.

So, the next time you approach a familiar challenge, ask yourself:

• How would I encourage a child in this situation?

• How can I bring curiosity and presence to this moment instead of judgment?

• What new possibilities can I create by shifting my perspective?

Your inner dialogue is the foundation of how you navigate life. By shifting from judgment to curiosity, you’re not just reparenting yourself—you’re stepping into the role of a conscious creator.

The world doesn’t reflect back to you as it is; it reflects back to you as you are.

Change the way you relate to yourself, and watch as your external reality shifts in response.